


Makeup is Evil

by ChillyHollow



Category: Cormoran Strike Series - Robert Galbraith
Genre: Gen, Makeover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:40:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28481802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChillyHollow/pseuds/ChillyHollow
Summary: A makeover for Cormoran
Relationships: Robin Ellacott/Cormoran Strike
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25





	Makeup is Evil

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GTRWTW](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GTRWTW/gifts).



“Max has arranged for the hairdresser he knows to come over to my flat first thing tomorrow.Do you have the clothes you are going to wear ready for me to take home tonight?”Robin asked her business partner.

Strike nodded. “My suit bag is hanging on the outside of the closet upstairs in my flat for you to collect.”

“Good," Robin said.“Don’t look so tragic, you know this is a good idea.”Robin smiled as she watched Cormoran Strike check his pockets for his phone and wallet before leaving for this afternoon’s surveillance.“This is going to be fun, Cormoran.”

Cormoran himself smiled ruefully as he went through his mental checklist for this afternoon.“Fun” wasn’t the word he would use. Embarrassing, humiliating, annoying—those were the terms he could come up with right off the bat.Well, that was tomorrow’s problem.For today he had to concentrate on the job they were being paid to do.With a nod to Robin and a quick word with their office manager Pat about his schedule for the rest of the day, he headed out of the office, trying to forget about what Robin had talked him into doing in favor of thinking about the next task.

She was right, of course.He could make himself seem much less threatening, less tall, less intimidating, by changing his body language.Conversely, he could make himself pretty scary and he did a quite convincing drunk—useful in his line of work, but he only had a few tricks so he needed to learn to do more than that.He’d seen just how well his partner could transform herself with wardrobe and cosmetics.He thought of her Bobbi persona and smiled.That thought carried him to the tube station where he put his embarrassment over what they were going to do tomorrow aside in favor of today’s chores.

Late that afternoon Robin got Cormoran’s spare keys from his side of their partners desk and left the office.Instead of going down the stairs as usual, however, she opened a door she seldom used and went up the stairs to Strike’s attic sanctuary.She unlocked his front door and went inside.As promised, his suit bag was hanging on the closet door.Since Robin had driven her Land Rover to work today, she was taking his suit back to her flat tonight so he didn’t have to bring it on the train tomorrow.He could just come by her flat in the morning and then get to work on the transformation. 

She’d rarely been inside his place and she couldn’t stop herself from looking around.It was as tidy and bare as it had been the few other times she’d been inside.There were no touches of personality although she could see a few books on his bedside table.His comforter was a soothing blue-grey but she suspected he’d bought it for warmth, not because he liked the color.Everything was in its place.She would have known this flat was occupied by a disciplined and self-contained person, even if she didn’t know the owner well, just by the atmosphere here. No distractions, no strong emotions, just a place to eat and sleep when he wasn’t working.It was peaceful, in a way.She wondered why it made her sad.

Robin locked the flat up, returned the keys to their place in the desk, gathered the suit bag, her phone and tote bag, and left for her flat.

The next morning Robin’s roommate Max was up bright and early, excited to be able to help Robin and Cormoran with their work.He made Robin tea and toast, chattering about the wardrobe he’d assembled with the help of his fellow actors.“I think the three piece suit is the best of the lot but you’ll have to see what you think.”

“We’ll let Cormoran decide once he gets here.I brought his best suit home with me last night.When is Dot arriving?”Dot was Max’s hairdresser friend who had been thrilled to be asked to help with their project. 

“Probably around ten.Do you think I should put bacon on for Cormoran?”

“Oh, yes.That man can eat for England and he loves bacon.”

“Well, he’s a big boy.He’s got to keep up his strength.I’ll make him a full breakfast.”

“It’s not vegetarian bacon, is it?”

“No, that’s rubber, that is.I wouldn’t feed that to a guest!”Max was horrified.

“Strike eats it but he doesn’t like it.”

“Man has taste,” Max said with a twinkle.“He likes you, too.”

“Well, of course,” Robin said, hoping she wasn’t blushing.“We are in business together.”

Max said nothing, just smiled a little wider.Robin was sure she was blushing now.Luckily there was a knock on the door.Robin flew downstairs to let Cormoran into the flat before she totally embarrassed herself.

He looked the normal grumpy self she knew and loved.“Morning, sunshine!” she said.Sunshine glowered at her.“Max is making bacon.Go on upstairs.”

She followed him up the stairs, amused that he was moving faster after the magic word “bacon” had been uttered.It did smell good, though.Max did a great breakfast.Soon they were all at the kitchen table, Strike eating toast and eggs with bacon and drinking the good strong tea Robin had taught Max to make and enjoy.

“Max, this is good.Thanks,” Cormoran said as he ate a second piece of bacon with his buttered toast.Max used real butter, telling Robin that he was suspicious of the artificial spreads she bought.Certainly creamery butter had more flavor.Robin took a bite of her toast with strawberry jam and felt happy. 

“When is your friend coming over?”Strike asked Max.

“Dot’ll be here about ten.I have to say, your beard does grow fast.I’m jealous.When I have a role that needs a beard, the makeup department usually has to glue one on.”

“Growing a beard comes in handy when I have to go to court.I can’t be too recognizable and the photographers are relentless.Robin thinks I need to expand my range, though.”

“Well, she’s right.There’s a lot we can do with wardrobe and makeup to change how you look overall.”Robin heard a knock, and headed down the stairs with the last of her toast in hand.She opened the door to find a tall, androgynous creature with spiky sandy hair and brown eyes outlined with dark brown kohl. 

“Hello?Dot?” Robin said.

“Yeah, is this Max’s flat?”

“Yes, please come in.We’re all upstairs. I’m Robin.”Robin followed Dot upstairs, staying well back to avoid the big suitcase-like case Dot had swinging in one hand. 

“Dot, darling!” exclaimed Max as they reached the top floor.“How are you?Welcome to my home.”

“Max!”They exchanged air kisses after Dot dumped the suitcase on the floor.“Where’s the great detective?”Max pointed to Strike, sitting at the kitchen table still, cup of tea in hand. 

Dot circled around Strike, who followed Dot with his eyes, swiveling in the chair.“No, sit still.I want to see you from all sides.Good.Max, do you have the photos I asked for of the great detective here as he normally looks day-to-day?”

Max looked toward Robin, who opened her laptop to show Dot the photos of Strike in their office with his normal five o’clock shadow she’d taken when she persuaded him to use Max and his friends to learn to alter his appearance.Dot studied the photos, paging through them, stopping to look at Strike who was still drinking his tea, then flipping back to see other photos.“How fast does the beard grow?”

“After a week of not shaving it’s over half a centimeter.It grows fast.”

"Does your hair grow that fast?”

“Not quite that fast but it does grow pretty quickly.”

“Max says you want to look like a high priced solicitor.”

“That’s right, for court. I want to look totally different than I usually do, that’s the main thing.I can’t afford to be identified on the street for the job but court’s public and when I testify in a case, I am usually photographed coming and going.I don’t want to look like I normally do.”

“There are two ways we can go—shape your beard and hair or go clean-shaven and add a mustache.It would have to be a very bushy one to hide the scar on your lip, though.Probably better to just shape the beard to make your face look different.Then we can restyle your hair.Max, where do you want us to work?”

Max told them his bathroom downstairs, so Strike finished his tea as Dot opened the suitcase and grabbed a few items.Then Strike followed Dot toward the stairs to Max’s big bathroom on the lower level.“Bring us a kitchen chair, Max,” ordered Dot, so Max joined the parade, leaving Robin upstairs cleaning away their breakfast things.

Dot put Strike in the straight chair in the middle of the bathroom.Max settled himself on the toilet seat to watch as Dot lined up some bottles on the edge of the tub, then tilted Strike’s head slightly, and began to trim his beard with a pair of scissors.When both sides were done, Dot brushed Strike’s hair straight back, spritzed it with liquid from one of the bottles, then brushed it again.Dot studied the effect, then began to trim Strike’s mustache.Frowning, Dot put the scissors down to pick up an electric razor to trim the mustache a tiny bit more.Then Dot shaved Strike’s neck carefully with the electric razor. Strike’s hair was brushed again, and sprayed with the contents of another bottle, then carefully combed. 

“Ok, that’s it.You won't get the full effect until you are dressed in whatever you are wearing to court but I think this will work.” 

Max, who had been watching the makeover, said, “Let me add something.” He left the bathroom, returning swiftly with a small toolbox.When he opened it, Strike realized it was a makeup kit.“Max, I don’t know…makeup seems wrong to me,” he said.

“Do you or don’t you want to fool the press and the public?This is what I do so trust me,” Max said sternly.He told Strike to stand and face him, eyes shut.Strike reluctantly allowed Max to carefully blot something over and under his eyes, then put streaks of something else under his cheekbones.Max then used a soft pad to powder over the areas he’d touched.

Dot was nodding.“Perfect!”Strike stepped over to the mirror to look at himself.His hair was straighter than normal and slicked back from his forehead, making it look larger than it usually did.His beard was blunt cut, chiseled and shaped so that it narrowed his face, giving him a foxy look that Max had enhanced with the makeup under his cheekbones.The dark circles under his eyes were gone.He looked different, that’s for sure. 

“One more touch, I think,” said Max who had been studying Cormoran in the mirror as well.He grabbed a pencil from the toolbox and holding Cormoran’s chin in his hand, made his eyebrows darker.“Now look in the mirror.”Strike did as ordered.The extra color on the eyebrows made them shaggier looking.He was transformed.He looked like a well groomed solicitor, although one who was certainly open to something shady.Strike smiled.In the mirror he looked sinister.

Max was talking.“Now wardrobe I think.Once you settle on an outfit, then I’ll teach Robin to do the makeup on you.It’s easier to have someone else do it.You’ll have to get Dot here to do the hair and beard.That takes a master’s hand.”

“You two are marvels.”Strike took out his wallet and gave Dot a business card.“Send us a bill, Dot.Will you be willing to come out and do this again when needed?”

  
“Absolutely.I can come up with other looks that you can use for surveillance, too.But this will work for now and you can simply wash your hair and shave the beard and you’ll be back to normal.I’ll leave you the two bottles.You saw what I did to your hair.I’ll number them so you remember the order to use them in.”They headed upstairs to show Robin since Dot had to leave soon.

Robin gaped at Strike.“Amazing!”She walked around him, studying the hair.“What did you do to his cheekbones!?Was that makeup and the beard cut?The hair I get, that’s just some sort of styling product to straight it and tame it a bit, then brush it back to show Cormoran’s forehead.The beard is perfect, Dot!”

Dot smiled in pride, then took two business cards from the suitcase and gave them to Robin and Strike.“Got to go, folks.Max, I’ll see you on set next week most likely.Let me know when you need me, Strike.And Ellacott, I can do the ladies, too….”

“You are a genius, Dot.I can use some tips.I’ll email you to set up a date to get together in about two weeks.I won’t be going to court this time but I sure am getting tired of hair chalk!” 

Dot laughed, then headed with the suitcase down the stairs, Max following and congratulating Dot on the transformation.

Strike felt suddenly shy.Robin was studying him intently.“You look great, a little shady and aggressive.”

“Instead of the mild, shy flower I am normally?” he teased.Robin laughed.Max reappeared.“Let’s pick an outfit, shall we?” he told Strike. 

“Robin brought my suit.”

“That might not be the best choice.We’ll try several outfits.I borrowed several things from Wardrobe that might work.Robin, come with us.You can wait downstairs while I get Strike here changed, then tell us what you think.”They all went back down the stairs, then Robin sat on her bed while Max took Strike into his bedroom across the hall.A series of outfits were laid out on the bed.One was Strike’s best suit but the others were new.There was a three piece suit, a red and blue tie, herringbone jacket, navy slacks, and a heavy gray Aran cabled sweater.“What do you want to try first?” Max asked. 

Cormoran choose the slacks and sweater first.Max said, “Too casual for court.Try the jacket instead.”So Cormoran removed the sweater, put his shirt back on, tucked it into the slacks, added a tie, and shrugged the jacket in place.“Better,” Max said, “but still a tad casual.Let’s show this to Robin and see what she thinks.”

Strike walked across the hall and leaned against the door jam.Robin smiled at him.“You look good but is that what a solicitor wears to court?” 

“Probably not.Max said that, too.Guess I’m wearing one of the suits.”Strike returned to the bedroom and changed into his Italian suit.

Max thought that was better, and studying himself in the full length mirror, Strike agreed, but he headed across the hall again to see what Robin’s opinion was.

Robin tilted her head and studied her partner.“Maybe it’s because I’ve seen you in that suit a couple of times, but it doesn’t persuade me that you are a solicitor as much as the slacks and jacket do.It’s also too expensive a suit for a sleazy second-rate solicitor to own.Max?”

Max studied Strike carefully.“Maybe you are right.Let’s put on the suit with the vest and see if that’s more convincing.”Strike headed back to Max’s bedroom and changed suits.The three piece was a pale gray.The color made Strike look a little sallower than usual.He walked across the hall again to show Robin who was cross-legged on her bed.She gave him a big smile.“That’s perfect!”

Strike looked at himself in Robin’s full length mirror, turning this way and that.Max came in the bedroom and sat on the bed next to Robin.“I should use a different shade of concealer, make you look a tad more yellow.That won’t photograph well and muddy the photo some.Strike, I think that’s the look.”

Strike nodded.Robin pulled out her phone and had him pose for pictures.“We may need these to recreate the look,” she told him. 

Strike rolled his eyes.“Not to be shared, Ellacott!”She grinned but promised.

“Can I get out of this stuff now?” he asked Max a little plaintively.

“Sure.I need to teach Robin how to do your makeup next.Take the suit off and grab a towel from the bathroom to put around your shoulders.That’ll keep the powder and such off your shirt.”Strike, grumbling, did as he was told.Soon all three of them were back in Max’s bathroom, with Max removing the makeup he’d added, then showing Robin how and where to reapply it.He switched to a different shade for the area under Strike’s cheekbones which made him look a little ill, but Max said that was all to the good.Strike had to remove the makeup again so Robin could try to replicate Max’s work.She did a pretty good job of it, too.The fact that it was Robin touching his face was certainly nice.Finally he was allowed to clean up his face and change into his regular clothes while Robin and Max headed upstairs to make lunch.

Strike packed his Italian suit back in the bag, then added the three piece suit he was borrowing from Max for his court appearance.He left the bag on Robin’s bed so she could bring it to work the next time she drove and headed upstairs to see what was for lunch.

Turned out lunch was roast beef sandwiches and crisps which they ate at the kitchen table while listening to Max explain how he’d met Dot and how stage makeup had transformed several of his actor friends completely.“Everyone remembers the Harry Potter makeup, like those gills underwater, which were pretty elaborate but the real star was Valdemort’s look.That was all simple makeup and Ralph Fiennes’ acting except for the nose which was CGI.”

“What you did with Cormoran was amazing.I wouldn’t have recognized him except up close and I know him well.”

Max looked modest.“It’s what I do.Actors have to be able to create any character.”

“You do it well,” said Cormoran.“Thanks, Max.Robin or I will get the borrowed suit back to you after Wednesday’s court date.”

“Keep it as long as you like.Wardrobe was happy to loan it to me for a bit.” 

They finished eating and Cormoran volunteered to wash up.Max wandered off to his bedroom to pack up the unneeded clothing to return to Wardrobe and Robin made coffee.She and Cormoran sat at the kitchen table to drink it.

“Want me to take you and your outfits home, Cormoran?I was planning to go grocery shopping with the Land Rover this afternoon.”

“Would you mind?I’m dying to get home and shower.”

“You don’t like playing a solicitor?”

“Not really.I don’t like how the makeup feels.”

“You should leave it on, then.Get used to it. You’ll need it for court, you know.Although maybe being uneasy is a good thing, helps you stay in character.”

“I didn’t realize what makeup could do, but I should have.I’ve seen you completely transform yourself, Robin.”

“Do you think contact lenses might help?I use sheer color change lenses occasionally.”

“That might be too much,” Strike said, uneasy about going too far, too fast.

“Well, we’ll see.Guess you need to get through your court date first before you try them.”

“And I used to think you were the only woman I knew who never tried to change me,” growled Strike in mock anger.Robin laughed.

“Come on, let’s get your clothes and Mr. Grumpy home.”Robin led the way back down the stairs to the bedroom level.Strike collected his suit bag and Robin got her purse, then they told Max goodbye before heading outside to the Land Rover.

Watching Robin as she competently drove him toward Denmark Street, Strike reflected that a partner like Robin was certainly a very good thing.Even if makeup was involved.

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to GTRWTW who mentioned tvtrops.org. Since Curious is my middle name, I had to go there to explore. I found the outdated "all makeup is evil” trope and this is the result.


End file.
